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Today was a weird day. It was both wonderful and sad, the epitome of bittersweet. You see, like I mentioned earlier, today was the last service held in my home church. After today they will start meeting in their new facility, a few miles down the road. What's the difference in a few miles? Not a lot and absolutely everything.

I worry now that the connection I had maintained there will not exist anymore. There have been several times throughout the past 6 years that the only thing that made that church feel like coming home were the wonderful memories attached to the location. I remember running barefoot up the long hallway while I was in elementary school. I remember painting the pit walls black and then having to scrub the carpet because people tracked the black paint everywhere. I lost myself in worship countless times, cried over disappointment and cried tears of joy as well. Ultimately, I grew up there.

And I dreamed of getting married there. Of having that wonderful moment in a place that has meant so much.

But like so many other things in life, it wasn't meant to be. And even though it's nagging at me like a paper cut right now, I am excited for the church and their new building. They need the space and can use this facility so much to reach the community. Selfishly, I just feel less a part of the church now that they've moved. And that makes me sad. Really? I long to be connected again, to feel a part of something like I used to there.

A nostalgic post tonight, I know, and I apologize. I'm going on vacation this week and I think the time away from responsibilities and stress is just what I need to rejuvenate some. I'm sure countless stories of laughter and good times will follow, so tonight just hang with me. I needed to express some of the feelings I was having to start getting past them.